A special genre

*This post was first made to my daughter's original website on July 6th, 2023. Every post is being moved to this website in an effort to keep my daughter's identity private after she requested so.*

Dear Daughter,

When you were only a few months old through about age four or five, I came across a genre of music that helped me cope with the loss of this open adoption. I found music was healing for me along side spending time with horses.

I was going to school at William Woods University in Missouri for Equestrian Science after you were born. At school I had riding classes where I was to take care of the horses and learning from experts (even after years and years of professional training!) There truly is something so special about being the the presence of horses on a daily basis. Without that school, I don't know if I'd even be on this earth. I swear, the only reason I made it through your first year of life was the fact that I had these incredible animals to lean on, both at school and at home. It's so healing and I hope your parents allow you to experience horses firsthand for your own healing.

While driving back and forth to school, I listened to a genre that I'd classify as Indie Folk. It included bands like Lord Huron, Gregory Alan Isakov, The Head And The Heart, Bon Iver, The Oh Hellos, The Lumineers and so many others. I won't lie, I cried a lot, and I still do.

I stopped listening to this type of music over the last five years or so because it took me back to some of the hardest times of my life and made me pretty emotional, even though I genuinely love these artists.

A few months ago, I saw that The Head And The Heart were coming to a venue close by so I booked tickets. Monday night was the concert and I'd be lying if I said I was super excited to go. In fact, over the last few weeks, I've thought about selling my tickets or just not going at all. I didn't want to deal with the emotions.

Well, we ended up going and the concert was SO GOOD. And it was good for the soul too. They sounded exactly like they sound on record. You'll have to take some time and listen to their music. Rivers And Roads, Lost In My Mind, Another Story and Down In The Valley are probably some of my favorite songs by them.

Casey and I are actually looking into getting tickets to another similar concert later this year but are still unsure if we are going to go. We are hoping your parents would like to get together this year to talk through everything and get on the same page. Our travels are somewhat dependent on potentially meeting since you're always my first priority, but I fear that they will continue down the path that they are currently on. I'm staying hopeful, but trying to remain realistic at the same time.

Thinking about you today and everyday,

-Abby